Wednesday 8 February 2012

Cult Kings of the Video shelf!

So your making a movie say in europe and youv got fuck all of a bob on yahe cause no one really wants to fund Zombie Alien Nazie Hookers from Santaland 6. What do you do...you hire these guys.


(1)Lance Henriksen
I love this man. The guys a fucking living legend. Be he Bishop the milk vomiting andriod with a "heart" of gold in Aliens or the moody manhunter Frank Black in Millennium hes chewing scenery. If hes not chewing senery then its most lightly gravel.....the guys voice is wicked....lets just say you dont want him reading you kid a bedtime story. But he is a legend and an underated talent whos star power shouldnt be found on the video shelf. The guy learned to read when he was 30,  he taught himself by studying film scripts and was one of the few saving graces in the AVP movie. Lance you are a legend.

Check out: Aliens, Millennium, Near Dark and Pumpkinhead Avoid: Mind Ripper.



(2)Rutger Haur
 Another guy who really should have gone on to better things Rutger Haur is mental...but in a good way.
Whether it be convinceing Ridley Scott to let him take a  dangerous jump for a shot in Blade Runner or  uttering a  shithouse mad line like "Let go of me demons your crushing my smokes!"  in Hobo with a Shotgun the man will anything cause he knows he can do anything. Theres some might give me a load of shit for saying this but I think hes way better in Hitcher then Blade Runner. Why you may ask? Its easy the guys so good a playing a fucking mad man cause....well....he is a mad man. In hobo with a shotgun he jumped out a window with his hand bound buy masking tape before the crew could say "Wait Rutger your 67....you shouldnt...oh shit he made it"
Roy Batty may have Seen thing you wouldnt belive.....but the shit weve seen Rutger do well you wouldnt belive it either. Thank Mr Haur.

Check out: Blade Runner, the Hitcher and Hobo with a shotgun. Aviod :Omega Doom.


(3)Clint Howard
I dont care who you are or what you watch youv seen somthing with Clint Howard in it. The  brother or Ron Howard ((yeahe Richte from Happy Day and the guy who director of Apllo 11)) he was a child actor who grew up....however it seem this was a reverse ugly duckly case. Clint is the most oddest locking bloke to ever be exposed to the moving picture. Which explians why he mainly only get bit parts as rednecks, convicts and all in all human waste. Having said all this however Clint can act...he takes a 2 minute role and makes it his own. Dosent matter if hes Dinosaur chow in Carnosaur or the Bullied Nerd in Evil Speak the guy makes it his own. Clint you may not be Brad Pitt but you can sure as shit act.

Check out: Carnosuar and Evil Speak. Aviod:Ping




(4)Eric Roberts
You want a really good bad guy for your movie you get Al Pacino. You cant get Al you go for Eric Roberts instead. The guy is the Master class at playing an Evil shit unlike his sister Juila whos always been the rom-com queen. Hes been a baddie in Heros,  The Justice League cartoons, The Dark Knight and chewed the shit out of the scenery in The Expendables. While hes good at playing bad hes been a bit naughty in real life too In 1987, Roberts was arrested for possession of cocaine and resisting arrest after he tried to assault a NYPD cop. He spent 36 hours in jail, pleaded guilty to harassment, and had all other charges dropped then in February 1995, Roberts was arrested for shoving his wife, Eliza Garrett, into a wall.
Eric Roberts your the King of Naughty basterds.

Checkout: The Dark Knight and The Expendables. Aviod: Cyclops and D.O.A .




(5)Mark Dacascos
This guy has done it and played it all. How and why you may ask? Cause Mark is any and every race.
The guys dad  Al Dacascos, is from Hawaii, and is a martial arts instructor of Filipino, Spanish, and Chinese ancestry. How can you beat that? Well the Chairman on Food Network's television series Iron Chef America. Hes played the Crow in the shortlived but pretty good Tv series and done another comic book adaption in the form of Crying Freeman. Is there there anything he cant do....nope....hes been in  Dancing with the Stars this guy will and can not be stopped.

Checkout:Brotherhood of the Wolf and Crying Freeman Aviod: DNA




Hail to the kings of  budget movies may you live forever.....or at least till your next direct to video movie comes out.

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